Jim and I recently celebrated our 40th wedding anniversary . My marriage commitment ranks second only to my commitment to God. They go hand in hand in a lot of ways. When I became a Christian I vowed to put God’s commandments first in my life and when I got married I vowed to put my marriage vows first.
Love comes first in both relationships and when you truly love someone you put their wants and their needs first. This has not always been easy. Over the years, I have struggled with differences in my wants over my husband’s needs. Looking back at some of the silly things we disagreed on when we were first married, I just shake my head. Can you believe we once fought over how to cut toast? Of course, what you are fighting about is usually not the issue at all and in this case it was just two people trying to find a way to take two separate lives and blend them into one working unit. COMPROMISE! Over the years we have learned to do that a lot. Over time and a lot of really hard situations, you realize a lot of stuff is just not worth fighting about. We know each other well enough to know when to give each other space and when to give each other an ear and offer an opinion. If he has worked a 14 hour day and is exhausted I know to just feed him and let him hit the recliner unless he wants to talk. Likewise, if I am sick he knows to just leave me alone and not ask me every 30 minutes how I am feeling but he can usually tell before I can that I am getting sick while I am still in denial.
With God there is no compromising; His word is Law. I struggle with this because it is very hard to put myself completely in His hands. I am selfish in that I want to control my life instead of letting God control it. The only way to be able to give my control issue to God is to pray and read the Bible every day. I also have some great Christian friends to help me with my struggle.
As I get older and more mature both in my married life and my Christian life I have become more content. I have complete faith in God and in my husband. I know I still will have moments when I will mess up and struggle but I know I can confess and ask for forgiveness and it will be given.
This is one of my favorite verses in the Bible and I would like to share it with you. It sums up what it means to be a good Christian and a good spouse. 1 Corinthians 13:4-8 Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongdoing. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres. Love never fails.
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